At first I had trouble dropping in. There were noises in the hall and my cell phone started to ring at one point. I quietly turned it off but not before Christian (and the group) took notice. I especially felt Christian's energy taking it in; that I hadn't turned off my phone before we began. I started to feel a little anxious about this after the ringer went off and hearing the noises in the hall but it wasn’t too long after that I started to center and let go. I did try not to lean back against the chair but the sun and the comfort of the chair were lulling me back and my body/mind started to move into more of a nidra state than one of alertness. (I now understand why Clairvision/meditation groups encourage not leaning into the chair if not sitting on the floor.). A few times I felt my body fall slightly forward like I was going to nod off. (Others shared later that they felt this sensation too.) Strangely going to Black Mountain came up again this week. It wasn't as pressing but I was drawn to going there for yoga.
After a good bit. I started to wonder where Samuel was and he remarked from over my right shoulder that he was here and then immediately afterwards to my left, I saw an adversarial person who has recently reentered my life in my visual field to the left. I wondered why I was seeing them both almost simultaneously and thought maybe Samuel is in some way helping me with this problematic person? I saw the usual animals again today, the horse that I slipped into and the walrus. I also saw a peacock this time. It took me a moment to identify its feathers. At one point I saw Christian and I standing at a crossroad (intersection) near my office as we were back last summer the day he asked me to join.
Half way in he guided us to move into the chakras and I was (once again) impressed with how unhurried he was today with his prompts .
We were directed to start at the throat and this week instead of seeing a rope, I saw baby snakes swimming around and I intuited that a few were poisonous. At the heart envelop I felt some expansiveness but it was hard to stay there. My mind kept drifting elsewhere from this spot. At the solar plexus I felt slightly nauseous and I was curious why.
At another point I saw a beer in a big mug and I drank it down knowing that I shouldn’t but it was so tempting and tasted so good. I let myself enjoy it. At the end Christian had us merge the ‘charge’ area with the third eye I am not sure how the words were prompted but it felt like a triangle moving out from my body to an apex away from the conjoined two spots below and above. Like a trinity of energy and a kundalini rising of sorts. I saw the most amazing light afterwards that billowed outward with streams that had an angelic nature about them. My mind then traveled to the heart area and I saw a box which I opened with a key that I was given. In it was a book. It seemed that it held my records, specifically those of how this life pertains to a past one that I’ve had. One that keeps coming up for me. I opened the book and the paper seemed ancient even though it was pristinely intact. The cover said “Me”. I felt that it contained secrets held that I am starting to uncover or should I say unravel(?) Secrets and lessons that I can access through this work meditating and writing.
We talked about our experience when we finished and Bethany remarked how amazing she feels on Tuesdays after our group. I said to the group that I sometimes feel spacy afterwards, like I need to be in one reality or the other but I am stuck inbetween as it is taxing for me to go back to the other when leaving here. My words especially ring true right now tonight but I can be relieved to know that my day is over and all that is required of me is finishing this before going to bed.
The peacocks feathers are meaningful to those with this power animal, for they also have an association with resurrection, rising out of the ashes. They can help us shed the old feathers of the past and to take back the true beauty of our individuality.