Rosie is a favorite teacher and highly creative.  She sequences differently in every class. What makes her special though is how she makes you feel when you get to class, like you and she are best friend and there is no barrier between you.   I leave her class refreshed on an emotional level and feeling stronger physically after she's thoroughly kicked my butt.  Here is an interview with her that took place at a picnic bench at Liberty Café after a recent early morning class with her.
 
You are very giving, how do you replenish yourself?
 
I meditate every morning.  The giving of it self is a replenishing for me.  For some reason when I give I get fuller.  I do take an Epsom salt bath every night.
 
One of my passions/goals in life is to try to reach one person, and to help them see how I found happiness in life, “fullness”. That fullness came to me when I realized that my connection with God had to be my priority in life.  After having worked the 12 Steps a woman guided me on the correct path, and I found this fullness.  This can mean different things to different people.
 
For me, my life can be defined as before yoga and after yoga.  Did you have that deep demarcation?
 
I would say working the 12 steps was it for me.  Interestingly there is some question about this but there may have been some cross over between the 12 Steps and the Yoga Sutras. I had already practiced yoga for years before going to AA.  When I started practicing here in Asheville, I learned the Sutras and this helped me to see the similarities with the Steps and how to fully use them in my teaching.
 
Do you remember a defining moment?
 
It has been a subtle process (for me) but this woman in Florida really helped me find my path after having worked the steps for the fifth or sixth time.
 
Do you want to speak to Addiction?
 
Everyone is addicted to something.  We are constantly chasing our likes and avoiding our dislikes and that is all addiction is.  We go into our comfort zone and we stay there.  I have been addicted to so many things.  It might be potato chips and eating them mindlessly while I am on the computer and needing to learn to get out of the kitchen and checking my emails upstairs instead.  Changing habits.
 
Samskaras?

Yes
 
How after 40+ years of teaching do you keep it fresh in each class? 

I work hard at it.  I prepare for my Tuesday class the weekend before and my Thursday class on Wednesday.  I practice it and then am ready to teach the next day. Each class I focus on a body part.  It might be hips, backs, or feet and then I plan the sequence around this. I never take teaching for granted.  I also try to incorporate the Sutras into my teaching.
 
How have you been able to keep the personal touch in your yoga classes given it has become in many ways big business?
 
For me, when I am teaching I am so appreciative of what I am doing and the connection to the class and students. When I am connected to God or Spirit and giving of myself in such a way….how can it be anything but personal?
 
How do you stay humble?
 
Well thank you for saying that. I try to connect with God in all things and this helps me to stay humble and grounded and not letting my ego get in the way.
 
EGO easing God out.
 
Yes
 
 
How do you think kids are different now from when we were younger?  Without getting judgy but I guess I am and so will own this.
 
Well in judging, I would say that things in some ways are hard for kids in general and kids showing up for (yoga) class don’t necessarily have the foundation that we had.  They might not have solid grounding of family and structure or parents around when they get home from school and for dinner as we did.  Maybe in some ways yoga offers this for them. 
 
What advice would you give new yogis or yoga teachers? 
 
I would say think long term.  When you are doing poses.  Think how will my body feel in later years if I do this now.  Avoid injury.  If you get hurt then that is going to take you out of your practice.
 
Isn’t that hard?  I mean when we start we are so gung ho. 
 
Yeah but like falling in love you are all in but still you can try to think long term and (keep your head about you.)
 
What was your first class like?
 
I remember it well. It was back at the preparatory school in Coconut Grove (Sacred Heart Academy).  I remember doing shoulder pose and just loving it. Then I started to teach back then. We would walk out to the pool with the lions spurting out water.  I didn’t think anything of it back then but now I think ‘that's pretty cool.’
 
Who have your Master Teachers been?
 
Well Eve Diskin.  She was my first teacher and Jimmy Barkan. And my ballet teacher who was so spiritual, who taught me so much about discipline. Stephanie Keach when I did the YTT here in Asheville. Since moving here I have learned the Sutras and have really developed more of a spiritual center.  Michael (MJ) at AYC has helped me to sew all the pieces of my spiritual being together like knitting a sweater.  Joe has helped me with this too.
 
When I go to your class I feel accepted and I was talking to another student today and she remarked the same thing.  You make everyone feel so special.  It is like Romper Room!  ‘I see Kris and I see Brett and there is Birdie!’

(Laughter!) Is there a theme song from that show?
 
What archetype (or caricature of yourself) represents you? 
 
I don’t know, a bird maybe?  One that flies high.  It sounds grandiose and I don’t mean for it to be but what comes to mind is an Eagle. 
 
Well that’s appropriate because in Native American terms the Eagle represents Spirit. 

Perfect.  I am not saying that I am God but…
 
When you are aligned with your Godliness and you are in that place within you and I am in that place within me…Namaste, Rosie.
 
Yes, thank you Kris. 
Thanks, Rose.

I went downtown to find a book for Maura, my granddaughter on how to deal with the death of a loved one.   Her other grandmother, Barbara died this past weekend and I leave for the wake and funeral in a few days.  It seems difficult finding a parking spot and I don't know why at first.  I let go of even trying to find one and take a 'what will be, will be' attitude and voila! One is found.

I didn’t realize it but it is Mardi Gras weekend and there’s a parade starting.  I stand beside the parking space in the center of town putting on lip gloss. 

Damascus:  You don’t need to put money in the meter on Sunday.

Damascus: Oh…(when he realized I wasn't and then smiles sheepishly.)

Damascus: Do you have $2 to spare me for lunch.

Me: Still applying my lip gloss I looked at him and say, What are you having for lunch?”

Damascus: A hot dog he points in the direction of where they are sold. Then I am going to my sister’s.  

Me: Where does your sister live? 

Damascus: Off of Merrimon. 

Me: (I give him a few dollars, as I wonder how he is going to get to his sister's and think maybe I’ll offer him a ride but then think better of it.)  

Me: Instead I say, sorry to ask so many questions, I’m Kris.

Damascus Hi I am Damascus.  (we shake hands)

Me  What a perfect name to hear on a Sunday!

Damascus: Smiles. 

Me:  Damascus you sure you’re going to use it to buy a hot dog?

​Damascus:  Yes, I don’t drink.  (Pause)  I just smoke cigarettes. 

Me: Well they aren’t good for you either. 

Damascus:Yeah, but I am having trouble quitting. 

Me: Yeah, I know its tough. My husband is trying to quit, too. 

Damascus: I went to e-cigarettes for awhile but can’t find a flavor I like.  Then he changes the subject, did you know ma’am that there is a Mardi Gras parade starting soon?

Me: Yeah, Damascus I see that.  I hate parades. 

Damascus: He steps back slightly when hearing me say the word hate.  Then chuckles and tells me how I can get around the parade so I don't have to deal with it. 
​
Me: Thanks, Damascus, I may try to do that. Have a good day…

​Damascus: You too.

I have blogged about Maura before. She's my granddaughter and a pretty neat kid as I hope you too will find when you read this interview. 

Me: Where do you live Maura?
Maura: Boston
 
Me: Where is that?
Maura: MA
 
Me: Where is MA?
Maura: It’s a State.
 

​Me: But where is it?
Maura: (Pause) In New England
 
Me: How old are you?
Maura: Eight

Me: Tell me about being eight?
Maura: I just turned eight so I don’t know much about it but it’s fun so far.
 
Me: What grade?
Maura: Second Grade
 
Me: What do you think the biggest challenge is for second graders?
Maura: They get embarrassed by their parents.
 
Me: What might a parent do that is embarrassing?
Maura: Like they might do kids stuff. 
 
Me: Like what?
Maura: Well, (long pause) well.  Like if …they like… if it’s a kid pool party for kids and if a parent goes in the pool and like they play with the kids. 
 
Me: So how do you handle embarrassing situations like that?
Maura: Well what I do is wait it through and when we leave and then say could you please stop it, it is making me embarrassed?
 
Me: Do you think parents listen?
Maura: Sometimes. If (you) say your opinion and stand up for yourselves. Then yes.
​
Me: We have a new president.  What do you think is the most positive thing about him?
Maura: A good thing?
 
Me: Yes. 
Maura: Well he wants to build roads.  He wants to have people build roads. 
 
Me: What do you think is something that is not so good about him? 
Maura: He doesn’t want Mexican people to go into our Country. 
 
Me: If you were president what would be the biggest thing on your agenda?
Maura: If I were president I feel like I cannot bring peanut butter.  But I feel bad for the kids who can’t eat peanut butter.  So I would have a table that is peanut butter free and have the kids sit there.
 
Me: How would it be though if you had to sit at a peanut free table and your friends were at the other table how would you feel about that?
Maura: Well..(Thinking)
 
Me: It must be hard being president.  When you make one decision it affects other decisions.
Maura: Yeah.
 
Me: What is your favorite sports?
Maura: Gymnastics, lacrosse, track and basketball
 
Me: Which one are you going to stay with the longest?
T Maura: Track and Lacrosse
 
Me: You seem to have cool parents? What is one trait best about them?
Maura: My mom is kind and sweet and my dad is funny.
 
Me: You have an interesting Gaia and Poppy.  (Laughing) What is good about them?
Maura: Well Gaia is healthy and Poppy is nice.
 
Me: (Laughing) I want to be nice.
Maura: (Laughs) Gaia is nice (too).
 
Me: What is a challenge about being eight years old?
Maura: Nothing
 
Me: Nothing? If you had to pick a challenge?
Maura: Nothing (laughing)
 
Me: No thing? (Laughing)
Maura: (Laughing.) None
 
Me: What do you think it is the most important characteristic for an eight year old? 
Maura: What do you call someone who doesn’t disclude someone? Doesn’t matter if they are mean or nice—they include everyone.  I (also) don’t like someone who takes over the game.  I like people who let others take their turn.
 
Me: So being nice, inclusive and letting others take a turn?
Maura: Yes
 
Me: What do you think is the most important thing a teacher has? 
Maura: Being smart.  My teacher is really smart. She really explains things.
 
Me: What is the most important thing that a parent has?
Maura: Niceness. 
 
Me: What about a business?
Maura: Helpfulness.
 
 
Me: Helping the people there?
Maura: Yes
 
Me: Tell me about you?
Maura: I am nice but I am sensitive

Me: Do you think it is a good quality (being sensitive)?
Maura: Yes, if you do something bad or mean and don’t feel bad then that isn’t good. Sometimes it can be bad though. 
 
Me: They see your vulnerability?
Maura: What is that?
 
Me: Your defenses are down and people can take advantage of it?
Maura: Yes. My friend Courtney she cries a lot and is very dramatic over little things.
People make fun of her and say ‘ you cry a lot you are such a baby.’  I try to stand up for her and say people can cry.
 
Me: Do people make fun of you for crying?
Maura: No. I don’t cry at school. I only cry if I have a friend over and something mean gets said and (I) feel bad.
 
Me: What do you want to be when you grow up?
Maura: A teacher or a news reporter.
 
Me: What grade?
Maura: 3rd grade.  Not too old that they are sassy but not too young that they are crazy
 
Me: What advice would you give a kindergartener? 
Maura: Don’t goof off. Because you can get into trouble
 
Me: What advice would you tell another kid younger?
Maura: Be yourself and always be yourself. Some people were nice in kindergarten but they saw other kids being sassy and the joined in.  Just be yourself.

(“The privilege of a lifetime is being who you are.”  Joseph Campbell)
 
Me: Thank you.
Maura: You’re welcome

​I have blogged several times before about Joe as “our teacher” on my yogablog.co site because of the influence that he’s had on me since meeting him as a student five years ago.  
 
He says in the following interview that he aims to inspire and I would have to say that he does this well for me and for many others. His unique, upbeat, approach to life even when its been challenging, has been instrumental in helping me stay grounded and to keep the faith that life is good. At times I have looked around the yoga room and caught the look of endearment that he garners from both men and women during class. Knowing that his teachings not only touch me but others provides comfort as part of the collective.
 
I am glad that I was given this opportunity to talk to him in the following interview about his personal journey as a yogi /teacher.
 
Me: Tell me about yourself?
 
Joe: I’m 43 years old. I teach yoga for a living. I have a lot of passions.  Yoga.  Exercise and um..I am recovering from this head injury. 
 
Me: Tell me about the head injury?
 
Joe: That is my world right now.  I fell off my bike and hit my head.
 
Me: So what has been the ramification from the injury? 
 
Joe:  Head discomfort. When I get tired I get nauseous.  Teaching at first was exhausting.  I really couldn’t do any exercise.  Now I’m a little fatigued at night but I am back on track. But (still) cannot hold downdog or do handstand. 
 
Me: Did you have an MRI or any diagnostic test?
 
Joe: No because at first I was like what is going on?  This is not too bad. I think I’ll be better in a couple of days. Then I thought I think I will be better next week.  At the two-week mark I took a bike ride thinking this could be psychosomatic. I took a bike ride for like an hour.  I rode pretty hard.  I was like, man I feel great. But that night I was so nauseous and the next day I was trash.  Like I had just run a marathon not being in shape.  I was like this is a real thing.  Then another two weeks later I did another bike ride (Same thing).
So finally after a month, I need to drop into my meditation practice. 

Me: You mentioned the head injury has provided value to you in class.  How so?
 
Joe: It’s deepened my meditation practice, and taught me about head injuries and injury in general. It taxes you. It makes you have doubts about who you are. 
 
Me: Tell me more about that? 
 
Joe: When your head is injured it is the core of who you are on some level. At first I thought it was psychosomatic.  An illusion.  Head injuries play games on you.  You can see how someone could drop into a depression.
 
Me:  And they do
 
Joe: And they do. Exactly.  So that was educating.  Playing the edge.  I thought I could be stronger after this.  Saying mantras, meditating more deeply.
 
 Me: Tell me about your first yoga class?
 
Joe: I don’t know if I remember?  Maybe I do.  It was at a YMCA. I was living part time in Asheville.  The class was decent.  Then I went to another class, which was amazing.  After the second class I went to the teacher and asked her all these questions and she said you should come to my teacher’s class Mary Kay.  She wrote down her name and number and I started going to her often.  It was really sweet of her referring me to her teacher.  Yeah.  That’s it. 
 
Me: How has yoga changed you or not changed you? 
 
Joe: Or not changed me?  That is an interesting way to ask it…I think it’s changed me because I questioned everything I learned as a kid.  Ya know? You grow up in the South you learn rituals/tradition and then yoga is quite a different practice from that although very similar really. More similar than people think. 
 
Me: Yes, I agree. (more similar than people think).
 
Joe: As a certified student I had to study a lot of different traditions. It showed me that there are a lot of different ways out there and they are all so awesome.  In the south sometimes we are taught this is the only way. 
 
 Me: I almost wonder if Anusara was somewhat like that too?
 
Joe: Yeah, Anusara was a little like that.  That’s why I was drawn to it.  I had that familiarity of rigidity.  The leader was very charismatic.  ‘This is the best way.’
 
Me: So it mimicked your upbringing?
 
Joe: We (did) have to learn the other directions to be certified. We had to study with certain philosophers/teachers and had to have a certain number of hours. It was great to get different interpretation of the Bhagavad Gita.  I got Bill Mahoney and Douglas Brooks’ interpretations. That was really educational because growing up there wasn’t any agreeing with other interpretations.
 
Me: You had mentioned that your sister is a yoga teacher (too).  So even though you grew up in the South in the ‘Bible Belt’ sounds like your family is eclectic?
 
Joe: Yeah my sisters are very different and they all are into yoga, which is great. One of them teaches as a hobby. My mom is a devout Christian with a one directional vision if you will, but I think by nature she is really umm…open to everything.  She calls it faith. If she is pushed into a tight corner around something then she will see it from different directions.  So I think I learned that from her.  My dad is easygoing. 

Me: It is interesting we got into yoga about the same time but our paths have been very different.  You were more linear in terms of following one sect so to speak.  If you could do it over again and go back 20 years would you do the same thing that you did?
 
Joe: That is a tough call.  I don’t really have any regrets.  But it’s a tough call,  I studied with John Friend and I have habits that I learned that are bad habits. 
 
Me: Like what?
 
Joe: Like presenting myself like I am very confident, and I know the answers.  There are benefits to that.  People listen to you when you speak to them with confidence especially in a training environment.  So it’s a benefit.  But it is a habit that I am trying to soften.
 
Me: So John Friend taught the people certified in Anusara to have a certain confidence that you are alluding to as a good thing but also …

Joe: I don’t think he said you have to be confident but he taught that way and I learned these things from him (and others who followed him). Sometimes it may seem like cockiness.  I don’t think I am cocky.  If anything on a deep level I need to be more confident.  
 
Me: Tell me if this makes sense to you?  I think that my interpretation would be that given the rigor of the Anusara certification there is a readiness (when it is finished) to be confident. Do you think this is true?
 
Joe: Right
 
Me: Comparative to other trainings.  It seems very daunting to get certified. There was a lot of work entailed?

Me: Do you think that the yoga community was too harsh on John Friend?
 
Joe: No.  I mean on some level I wasn’t as harsh as everyone else because that isn’t my nature. But on the same level he wasn’t taking accountability.  I think they wouldn’t have been as harsh if he had taken accountability.

Me: Interesting…
 
Joe: If he had said hey look I did these bad things….
 
Me: (Laugh) ”Repent!”
 
Joe: Yeah what he did.  His actions.  People would have felt really connected to him if he stepped into his...
But he played his cards wrong. He denied. So people had to keep hammering into him. He asked for harshness. Because he wouldn’t step into his mistake. 

Joe: He really did shift himself eventually. He really did.
 
Me: What do you mean he really did shift himself?
 
Joe: He really did change from the experience.  But he never really said I am sorry like it is my fault.  He never took responsibility. I don’t know maybe he has now. But, he didn’t up front.
 
Me: Do you think that the ending that happened with Anusara (that phase of its existence) was inevitable?
 
Joe: I think that the leader (John) is strong willed and smart.  The Shakti lived through him and pushed through him.  The nature of Shakti is expansion and she will use people like that to push the envelop of consciousness and I think on some level that happened with John Friend. I think the process got him and people to open up. She uses people radically like that.
 
Me: How has it been a reflection of your life?  Your journey?  Being pushed to a new level.
 
Joe: It is good. It is challenging. Whenever you live a life to expand as the universe is expanding it’s hard.  But I am ok with that.  You know.  I have always been easily inspired. There is a strong part of me that wants to sit back and chill.  I could just appreciate being alive.  But for some reason I was being pushed. In my work I have had to be proactive in my journey of consciousness. There is a real joy with it.
 
Me: And a lot of responsibility.
 
Joe: Yeah. There is a lot of suffering with it too. Well when you push forward you are feeling a lot. 
 
Me:  How is it for you to hold space for student upset with the current political climate? 
 
Joe: It is really good for me to hold that space. You have to have your stuff together though when you hold space for other people.
 
Me: What fortifies you? 
 
Joe: My yoga practice, learning to keep my mind calm, exercise.
 
Me: Do you pray? Tell me about your spiritual practice?
 
Joe: Yeah. I think I do.  I grew up with prayer.  Right now I am in a phase of just clearing my mind. The more I study spirit the more I get into being on earth. The experience of spirit is manifested through all this stuff on the earth.  For me spiritual practice doesn’t pull me out of being here but brings me here more. Does that make sense?
 
Me: Yeah, especially for an athlete.  For someone who is an athlete then spirit is grounded in the physical.  Is that what you mean?
 
Joe: Absolutely.  This is it.  Maybe there is this amazing heavenly realm.  I just finished the book Proof of Heaven. The neurologist (Eblen Alexander) who had this near death experience and enters the heavenly realm.  He was so sick and he let go of his body, ego.  I grew up with that and believe that. And maybe that is real and I will be ready for it if that is the case.  Sign me up.  But for now it is here. If you get into being here more then you actually feel more connected to the heavenly realm whatever that might be.
 
 Me: What is your biggest pet peeve?  
 
Joe: Umm…when people don’t value the planet (and) take the planet for granted.  That is a really bad thing. I thought everyone valued the planet. But I am learning that people don’t even have consciousness around it.  That it is sustaining us and we are destroying it.  That is my biggest one.
 
Me: Do you go to yoga classes? 
 
Joe: I don’t. I have a goal each year to go and after the first few weeks it falls off.  I do want to go.  I want to experience yoga as a yoga student who goes to class. That is what people do.  They come to my class.  I don’t even know the world that they live in.  So going to a yoga class would give me insight into how they feel when they come to my yoga class.
 
Me: What do you look for in a yoga teacher?
 
Joe: The first thing I look for is someone who is teaching yoga verses exercise. Like if I go to a yoga class and they are teaching like an exercise class. Then I am very disappointed. The exercise is secondary in there. I am looking for something to shift your consciousness. Luckily in Asheville most teachers here have that.  So I should be going to more yoga classes. (laughs).
 
​Me: You are surrounded by women.  You are married, have a daughter, sister and most of the yoga community (at least 70 %) is women.  How is it being around women?
 
Joe: I wish there were more men in yoga.  I have pretty powerful women in my life and am comfortable around women. Maybe that is part of the reason that I am a yoga teacher.
 
Me: So you said that you are 43?
 
Joe: Um hmm
 
Me: So that is somewhat of a pivotal age of I am getting older.  How is that for you?
 
Joe: It is like a real thing, you know? (Recently) my hair was long and right after I got it cut I went home and my wife and daughter were like oh, your hair!  And my wife was like, oh she missed a hair here and she pulled this long hair out but it wasn’t the hair from my head, it was in my ear (laughter). Getting old is real. You know what I mean.  I like the wisdom part. (laughter).  Especially in my work.  When I think back to when I first started teaching yoga.  I was like what were people thinking (of what I said).  I was spiritual teaching and I didn’t know sh--.  I didn’t know anything.
 
Me: (The process of) yoga grew up with you.
 
Joe: Yeah. So for me it is nice to have the wisdom, but it is one of my goals to stay strong physically for long periods. I don’t mind if I die early but I want to stay in good health and be moving the whole time so…
 
Me: You are a very disciplined person.  I respect that about you. Tell me about your relationship with discipline? 

Joe: I think I need more of it.  Discipline is a big subject matter.  I feel like I should have written books.

 Me: On Discipline?
 
Joe: No other things. I wish I didn’t procrastinate so much. 
 
Me: I notice that adept yoga teachers—they have this common denominator that they are disciplined. Do you think that people can be too disciplined? 
 
Joe: Look at Thich Nhat Hanh---something about that level of discipline and the military.  They have a whole new level of discipline.  I respect that and I think I could use that. I think if you take a lot of discipline (military and monk) and you have that in the common world. Man you could achieve so much. Especially if you had that mindfulness around it where you valued play
 
 Me: Interesting…sometime discipline if it’s too dry can connote to rigidity?
 
Joe: Yes
 
Me: What would you like to do next?
 
Joe: I am still holding this book thing.  It’s called In your body
 
Me:  A how to?
 
Joe: Yes, it is already written in my head.  I just have a hard time writing it down. There are these teachings AND they are in your body.  I think people have these teachings and they are too heady.  You need to bring things into the body. I can share yoga teachings as long as they can also be found in the body.
 
Me: Did you ever open a yoga studio?
 
Joe: No. Deirdre (another local, Anusara certified teacher) and I almost opened one nine years ago.  I think we would have been great partners together. But she was pregnant and I had just had a baby and was like ‘I can’t deal with this right now.’ I didn’t have enough ‘big picture’ back then.
 
Me: Any regrets?
 
Joe: Every once in awhile I think it would be pretty neat to have a yoga studio but now I really like the situation I am in, so no regret.
 
Me: Is there anything you’d like to add (before we finish)?
 
Joe: I am grateful for the people in my life. I am appreciative to my daughter for her openness, my wife. I am grateful (to have) their support of family. The openness of community.

Me: What is one trait your daughter and wife both have that you admire?
 
Joe: Humor
 
Me: Oh that is great.  So important.
(Thank you, Joe.)
http://plumvillage.org/about/thich-nhat-hanh/

I left yoga today and headed to Wholefoods.  I half expected to see the older man but didn't and I felt no intention of "interviewing" anyone else even though I did see a few others perched on corners and side streets.  I know this is a generalization, but I have found the homeless to be very friendly in DC. They make eye contact with you and genuinely seem to want to make a connection independent of wanting anything from you.  It really is refreshing to experience.  

I saw a few people, made eye contact and said hello but nothing more as I went into the store.  I bought a hodge podge of a few stuff for lunch and then hurried towards home.  As I was walking down one street about two blocks for home a young man stopped me. 



Norris:  HI Mame.  Can you spare a few dollars for food?

Me:  Do you have a few minutes to talk?

Norris:  (Shrugged his shoulders) Sure.  

Me:  Are you homeless? (Hand him some money and the fruit in my bag).

Norris:  Yeah.  (Oh! I love this kind of fruit!  Starts eating it.)

Me:  Where do you live?

Norris:  I go from friend to friends

Me:  Are you from DC?

Norris:  Yeah

Me:  Is this where you want to live?

Norris:  I would love to live in Atlanta

Me: Have you ever been?

Norris:  No

Me:  Do you mind if I ask you how old you are?

Norris:  I am 26 

Me:  Wow.  You are so young.

Norris: yeah.  

Me: Did you go to school?

Norris:  i graduated form HS and went to...(names a school in DC)

Me:  What kind of work do you want to do?

Norris:  (Quickly) I will do anything! Dishwasher, anything!

Me:  I wish I could get you a job . So you live on the street? 

Norris:  Yeah.  It sucks. People try to steal your stuff.

Me:  Ugh..you have nice clothes.  What about Shelters?

Norris:  I don't want to stay there.  There are bugs.

Me: Did you work before?

Norris:  Yeah.  I was a security guard and was making a lot of money.  But, I lost my job and now I have a record and cannot get a job.  My baby's mom accused me of hitting her in the stomach when she was pregnant.  I didn't do it!  But I went to jail anyway. 

Me: You went to jail?  

Norris:  Yeah.  Six months.  It was bad.  (He points up the street).

Me: That must of sucked.  It is a pretty serious accusation.  You didn't do it? 

Norris:  No.  She was just saying it.  

Me:  Why would she say it if it wasn't true?  

Norris:  She wanted to get money

Me:  She got money from you?

​Norris:  No she got $2000 from the DV place.

Me:  How old is your child?  

Norris:  She's 4.  Chloe.  

Me:  Do you see her?  

Norris:  Not since I went to prison.  Now I can't get a job anywhere.  I have a record and am trying to get it expunged.  

Me:  That must be tough.  If you were going to go back and do things over again, what might you have done differently? (Is there a moral to the story here?)

Norris: (Emphatically said) I would get it (my record) expunged!

Me:  Well that is out of your control.  What would you do differently?

Norris:  I would have never met her and never had a kid

Me: Why did you drop out of school?

Norris:  I have ADHD.

Me:  Do you take drugs? 

Norris:  No (street drugs). I take Dexedrine 15 mg for my ADHD it is prescribed to me.

Me:  Why did you drop out?

Norris:  My grandmother died

Me:  Was she paying for your education?

Norris:  Yes, but that is not why.  She was my backbone. 

Me:  I am sorry to hear that she died.  

Norris:  Yeah.  (We both look away.)  

Me:  What is your family like?

Norris:  They aren't up to par.  (We both smile at his reference to them.)

Me:  Oh. What advice would you give a little kid?  

Norris:  Stay home.  I was in a hurry to leave home

Me:  Would you mind, would it be ok if I took your picture?

Norris:  Sure

Me: Is this ok? 

Norris:  Yup that's me (as he looks at the picture and smiles.)

Me: Do you have an email?  

Norris:  Yup.  I check it every day at the library.

Me: Well I can't get you a job.  I will write up your story for my blog site.  I want to send you the write up and you can let me know if it's accurate and if you want me to change anything.  Ok?  

Norris:  Yeah.  (Starts to chuckle.)

Me:  I know I am a little odd...(doing this)

Norris: It's alright.  It's alright

Me:  Thank you  (shake hands. )

Norris:  Norris (introduces himself).  Like Chuck Norris

Me:  Nice to meet you Norris

Post Note:  Email from Norris-Thanks Kristin I really appreaciate you stoping and talking to me I hope everything goes well with the blog!

1/29/17 Update:  Norris found a job and is working

I am visiting family and have asked my nephew if I could interview him.  He is at the magical age of 10 hovering between  child and adolescent and he is a dear one, which you will hopefully see after reading this. (Picture of Mateo in the yellow with brother, Gavin)

Me: What grade are you in?

Mateo:   Fifth grade.

Me:  If you're to name three qualities a teacher has that's most important what would you say they are?

Mateo: That's tough. I would have to say keeping your students organized and not so they'd run around. I don't know which quality you would put that in now, maybe organization would be a quality. I would say selflessness because you have to worry about your students not just you, and I would also say forgiving.

Me:  Tell me more about forgiving.

Mateo: Because if your student makes a mistake, you can't be on it for the whole year. You have to eventually let it go.

Me:  What is the biggest challenge of kids your age?

Mateo: I would say  not worrying so much about what you're going to have in the future.

Me: Tell me more about that.

Mateo: I mean like you don't need to worry about what's going to happen in the future when you should be focusing on the past. So if I was worried about a test in January, and it's only September, I shouldn't worry about that test yet, because that would be for another four months or so. So I'm trying to say, when the time comes, you can get it over with without worrying about it four months earlier, because it's just going to make it more stressful.

Me: Do you think that people live their life worrying about January when it's September?

Mateo: I think people predict what will happen in the future.  People do worry, because they (think) about the future because you eventually are going to have the future it's not never going to come so it's hard not to worry about the future.  And sometimes people even worry about what they should have done differently in that process.

Me: Do you think this is more a problem with kids or adults?

Mateo: I think no matter if you live in Asia or North America I think everybody worries about the future and the past.

Me: What do they worry about with the  past?

Mateo: The past can be different things you can worry about what you could have done differently. So it can be like "I should have done this, I shouldn't have answered that, I should have done that," but at the same time you could feel thankful that you did that.

Me: Do you think sometimes even if we make mistakes we can be thankful for them?

Mateo: You can because maybe if your mistake can lead to something good.

Me: Give me an example because I think that's a really good point.

Mateo: So maybe if you mix two things together and it explodes, then that explosion you can learn from it. You can say, "Okay, we're making engines like this so eventually they'll explode so we should stop and try to fix the engines." I'm not saying that's happening but you can always thank yourself for making a mistake, because you can fix the mistake and make the world a better place.

Me: You don't beat yourself up?

Mateo: I do question myself, because I think that's healthy, but I do not beat myself [chuckles] up, no.

Me: Good. Do you know somebody who does? Without mentioning their name, necessarily, but you can. Do you know somebody who beats--

Mateo: Actually like physically or mentally?

Me: Both. I'm thinking mentally, but maybe you know someone who beats themselves up physically, because some people do.

Mateo: I'm actually reading a book right now, and there's this person playing quarterback. It's a football book, and they're not doing it for them. They're doing it for their father  when he really doesn't want to. And when he makes a mistake, he knows his father is going to say, "What happened out there?" And he's beating himself up, because he doesn't want to make a mistake instead of telling his father, "Dad, I don't want to play. I don't want to do this."

Me: So you're learning from this book?

Mateo: Yeah.

Me: If you were going to give this kid advice for not being authentic. You know what I mean by authentic?

Mateo: Can you give me the definition of authentic

Me: Guess what authentic means? He's not being authentic. (What does that mean?)

Mateo: Probably, he's not being like true to himself.

Me: Absolutely. So he's not being true to himself by playing football when he really doesn't want to. He's doing it because he thinks that his father has this expectation which might not even be true. Maybe his father would accept him if he didn't play.

Me:  What advice would you give to this kid?

Mateo: I would give advice that-- we have going on at school that says, "Don't be afraid be brave." So you have to stand up what you think. Otherwise, you can't let a kid do something to you that's not right. You have to stand up and say. "Dude don't do that."So you can say, "Dad I don't want to really play football." And that would be standing up for yourself.

Me: What do you envision yourself doing when-- we don't want to live in the future but sometimes we have aspirations.

Mateo: I would like to be an architect.

Me:  An architect. Do you like to design houses?

Mateo: Yeah. That would be really cool.

Me: That's awesome. So you're going to design (houses) and your dad will sell them? I know he likes real estate.

Mateo: Yeah. Hopefully, he's not too old for that.

Me: (Laugh) Tell me about your best friend?

Mateo: My best friend, well I have multiple best friends. Do you want me to name, one because I have a couple.

Me: Tell me a friend that you admire. Tell me about that friend?

Mateo: Do I have to say the name?

Me: No, you can make up a name.  Pete. Tell me about Pete?

Mateo: I like Pete because he's very brave and he is not afraid to do something.

Me:Does he make good choices when he does stuff?

Mateo: Yes. So he's not jumping off a cliff. But he would do something like - be brave and stand up for what he doesn't think. So if everyone was in classroom and he was in this math class and I was in class (too) and he would raise his hand and ask, "Why is that?" And everyone would say, "What do you think?" He says, "Because I don't know why!" So he stands up from what he thinks.

Me: He questions?

Mateo: And maybe he's right and people maybe he's wrong, but that's how we learn.

Me: Interesting. There is a woman whose kind of a famous speaker and one of the things that she said is, "Extra ordinary people are discerning, and they don't take what is accepted as fact.  I thought that that was a very interesting thing. Just because someone says, "Oh, this," and everyone's like, "Oh, sure," I like that Pete says, "Why?" He wants to dig a little deeper.
I agree with you that that's a really great quality.  

​Me: If you were going to give an eight year old some advice what would you say to them?

Mateo: Be young as long as you can.

Me: Be young as long as you can. What happens when you get older? What do you lose?

Mateo: You do become more in charge of yourself, but you don't have as much of a guardian. That being parents.

Me: You don't think your parents are around you as much when you get older?

Mateo: Well, you can go your separate ways.

Me: Oh, when you say older, do you mean 10 or do you mean like 20?

Mateo: Yeah, once you hit college, then you're out, and you fighting for a job, and you're travelling across the world, your parents aren't coming with you.

Me: Oh, okay. They may, you never know.

Mateo: Yeah. You never know but I want to go to California by myself. I would buy a plane ticket, go to California, come back. I mean maybe my parents, they one time left Gavin at California for a week on purpose. It wasn't an accident. And then he drove home with Poppy and grandma and they went back to New York.

Me: Did you worry for him?

Mateo: I don't want to say worried, I want to say-- worried for him? No. I just, I didn't want anything bad to happen to him.

Me: So you were a tad worried?

Mateo: Yeah. I guess you could say worried.

Me: What's the worst characteristic someone could have?

Mateo: I don't like when people doubt their self. You're basically saying, "I don't even believe in myself," which I think like, "But why? You have a long and healthy life so you keep trying and it's never going to come back at you because you because you tried." No one will tell you, "You're bad because you got a 59% on your math test." So, it's kind of like, if you try, people won't down you for doing it.

Me:  Believing in ourselves is very important.

​Mateo: Yeah.

Me:  What's your last piece of advice before we end? 

Mateo: Like quote?

Me: Yeah.

Mateo: All right, I actually learn this from a YouTube video. Don't be a hacky sack, be a bouncy ball and bounce back [laughter]. 

​Me:  That's awesome. Thank you, Matteo.

Mateo: You're welcome.

Interview with Bill a CEO of a large organization in DC

​(holding the neighborhood cat when home in AVL)

Tell me about an average day for you?

No day is alike. I will try to give you a typical day.  I aim to get a good night sleep and up by 6a.  Have a small breakfast and get to work by 730a.  It’s the only time I get to be alone and get caught up on those things I have to get caught up on. A phone call, email or to practice a speech. I have that hour and a half that is quiet.  There are lots of meetings during the day.   I run a diversified company. Departments include marketing, communications, IT, government relations, advocacy, law, events.  During the course of any given day I could be talking about a myriad of things, an event in Las Vegas to a Congressman’s about their stance, to a government agency about a regulation that they have passed. I basically have an open door policy with my staff which is important so that they can approach me when they need to.
 
Did you ever expect to be a CEO?  

Never. I never really felt that business was my acumen.  My strengths have always been communication, speaking, writing and collaboration.  I never thought that those traits (that I have known that I have had since I was a kid) would be important to running a company.
 
Do you now think that those traits are important?

 Absolutely.  They are critical. To be able to communicate.  To be able to take a position and then communicate that position effectively without necessarily causing a ruckus, but getting the point across.  Team building is another part of my job.  Recognizing when to push and when to pull.  This can vary from person to person and situation to situation.  It is learning people’s strengths and weaknesses.  Developing a team that is well balanced.
 
What are five aspects of self care that you espouse to?

• Sleep.  I think it is really critical.  You read about these CEOs that pride themselves on on 3-4 hour sleep/night.  I don’t know how they do it and are functional.
• Eating a balanced diet. I do eat a lot of frozen and prepared foods, but try to cook on Sundays for at least a few days. (I love to cook).
• Not sitting all the time. I don’t like to sit behind a desk all day.  I try to stand at meetings. 
• Being well groomed is important.  It helps with self-confidence.  It affects how you feel about yourself. 
• Exercise is also critical it helps you feel better and burn off steam.   

 
You have been in the job a year?  What is has been the biggest challenge?
 
As with all leadership roles, the biggest challenge is the people.  Some people are getting on board and some people aren’t. Motivating people.  People that I originally thought would be on board are not. Some of the people who I thought wouldn’t be are. There is a new level of accountability that some people weren’t used to.  'Why are you doing this?'  Does it bring value to the company (I ask them).  They never heard that before.  Challenging things that were considered sacred (before). 
 
So what I am hearing from you is that when a new leader come in there is often a change in culture? 

Nod

When you come in with a new culture do you suggest doing it abruptly or gradually?

I don’t know.  A lot of people would say that I did things abruptly but I think it had to be done that way.  I felt that there needed to be a change in leadership and direction.   Pressure testing people with new scenarios, work and situations.  Asking them to try different things.  To then see what they were capable of.  To see where they stood, to see if they wanted more (work/responsibility) to see if they could handle more.  I did that with each person.  Sometimes it was subtle and some times it was  obvious. July and August were difficult months but we seem to have turned a corner.  There was a lot of attrition.  It was to be expected.  I don’t feel bad about it. 
 
So you used the word 'pressure test'?  Is that an industry term or your term?

It is my term. I was thinking about that.  Someone else asked me about that.  'How are the first 6 months going?' That is the way I approached it.  I am backing off now. I have a good indication of what people can and cannot handle. 
 
Did you do it for the sake of what they could handle or did it naturally happen because you were a different type of leader with different expectations? 

That is a very good question.  It happened naturally because I expect certain things and for some it was unwanted expectations thrust at them.  It put a lot of pressure on them.
 
So you didn’t simulate it?  It was a natural occurrence? 

In some cases I did.  In some cases I took a look at the individual and saw that they weren’t performing.  'Is it that they are lazy? Or do have the capacity to do the work?  The manpower to do it?  Or the where-with-all to change.'  For some it was a conscious decision that I made to increase their load and see.  A number of people cannot develop strategy.  They are great on the execution.   
 
I was with you once at Borders when Borders was a bookstore and a man came over to you and said, Hey Bill, hi Bill! He acted like your best friend.  I asked afterwards who he was and you said, that he had worked for you. He quit? I questioned.   No I fired him was your answer.  I was impressed that someone would go out of their way to say hello when they had been fired by you. 
 What is the key to firing someone?  

The key to firing someone is that that individual knows why they are being fired.  No one should be fired and not have any idea why that is occurring.  You say, 'here are the expectations.  Here is how we do things.  If you can’t get it done there is a consequence.' You have to look out for the wellbeing of the company and the team.  You can’t add on to other people’s responsibility because someone isn’t doing their job.  That is not fair. 
 
What is the best part of the your job?

The best part of my job is the circle of friends that I have gained over 25-30 years (in the industry).  That is the best part.  We are all from the same industry and we enjoy each other’s company.  I was fortunate enough to have gotten this job.  They respect me for it.  But at the end of the day when we are all together I am just one of them.  Which is what I really like. 

Is it hard to be one of the guys (girls) as a peer/friend and yet step back in the role as a leader.  Is that challenging?  

That has been my leadership style. I have always been able to have friendship with people I work with.  A good number of them I am still close with after all these years even though I am now in a leadership role in the industry. We maintain a friendship. I am friends with them but when I am the boss.  I am the boss. When I am a friend.  I am a friend.  When I have to be a boss I have no problem being a boss.  They get it. 

Your biggest mentor and friend died last week (JP).  What did he teach you?

Never to take for granted the people who do the work for you. The people who work in the shop and install your products. 
 
So you are at the part in your career where you are looking towards retirement someday at some point. You are seeing some young people coming into the work place.  What advice would you give a young person today? 

Go the extra mile.  Differentiate yourself by how hard you work and come to me with solutions not problems. If you recommend something to me,  nine times out of 10 I will give it a shot.

What would you say is the strength of the millennials is? 

The ability to multi task. 

I don’t want to say weakness…what is their biggest issue? 

The same damn thing. 

Ok (laugh)
​
The same damn thing.  Their attention span is shorter.  They need a tremendous amount of stimulation, praise, ear phones, ear buds.  But they want to be successful to.  They need to understand that we aren’t going to hand them the keys to the kingdom.  It has to be earned. 
 
You talk about the exemplary person who goes the extra mile and brings forth solutions. How do you retain that kind of person? 

You offer them challenges.  New opportunities where they can make a difference.  You compensate them.  You give them plenty of time for their personal life.  I am big on that. An example a colleague that I work with he and his wife just had a baby.  He was debating on going to Vegas for the biggest event for our industry that is coming up next week.  I told him that he’s not invited.  Told him to stay home with his family.  If you have a good family foundation it helps a lot. 
 
Do you think the trends in business and culture has changed since you got into the profession?  

Our industry is a tight knit community second and third generation families who own businesses that are a part of our organization.  Now these businesss are being taken over by large corporations or private equity firms.  It is all about turning a quick profit (with some) without regard to giving back to the industry which many of these small mom and pops stores did and the suppliers do.  It is much more cut throat now.  Squeezing the last dime.  Partnerships aren't always as valued as they once were. 
 
You talk a lot about family offering perk and about being family friendly?

For me it is not a perk it is a way of life.

How do you honor that?  Shorter hours, longer lunches, more time off? Or just being more flexible when people have needs? 

All of the above
 But. ..I do  expect when there is a project under crunch time or something that needs to be done, they will get the job done.  I don’t care about the hours (they work) but do expect them to give 120% to do a great job, not just a good job.  I want to know that they will do what it takes to get it done. 
 
If you were going to offer a quote that ememplifies your leadership what would it be? 

I will use my high school yearbook quote and that is from Confucius, "When small man castes a big shadow the sun is about to set."
 It is a challenging job.  Some days I feel like an imposter and other days I feel like I am on top of the world.  It is hard to balance that sometimes.  You can get so high or so low.  Just maintaining a positive outlook and taking care of the people that work for you helps.

And not riding that wave?  Not getting caught up on the highs and lows? 

Right.  Knowing it will pass.  When it is low you got to really…then it is tough.  When things are down and morale is down... 
(Pause)

So then you have to take advantage of your self care tool kit?  Right. 

Yeah.  Exactly. 

Well.  Great. And anything else you can find? (both laugh)

Thank you Bill. 
Thank you.  My pleasure.    

Post Interview Question:  
How has yoga helped you?

It has made me a calmer person under pressure.  Taught me to take a step back and a deep breath while thinking things through.  It has humbled me in that it's not easy for me, neither the asana or the community.  I have learned to enjoy yoga and not see it as a competition and to try not to have judgements. 

I had plans to next interview someone homeless. Grandly thinking that they could give me a unique slant on life.  I ponder how I will value their opinion and what they have to say.  When I think of this homeless individual (often it is a man)  I envisioned someone whose life is less cluttered than most.  In yoga it is believed that when we let go of the barriers of distraction then we can get down to the essence of life and who we really are.   What better way to release distractions than to get rid of our attachments. To live with just our basic needs as our focus.  I remember my mom’s words when dealing with someone shallow “they probably haven’t suffered enough.” and of Nietzsche's“He who has a Why to live for can bear almost any How.”
 
Suffering doesn’t always make us deep, but it can. Of course I am also making the assumption that someone who is asking for money on the street is homeless, has suffered enough and has depth.  I guess that is the premise I was working from today.
 
So as I was laying in Savasana during yoga this morning, I was dreaming of the perfect homeless person that I would find here in DC or that would find me.  I envisioned sitting with them and setting up my phone voice memo and hearing their story.  Maybe they will want to use a fictitious name instead of their real one? Will they let me take their picture, perhaps a silhouette shot?  Will I pay them for the interview?  An exchange for their time?
 
I leave the studio hurriedly as I make my way out the door and down the steps out into the street having put all of this out of my mind temporarily as I almost run towards home,  straight into a homeless man.  
 
Wow that was quick, I think.  Is this the right person?  Is now, the right time? I stared long enough that he repeats his question.
 
Nameless Man:  Can I have a dollar for a sandwich?
 
Me: Yes, if I can interview you?

Nameless Man:  Interview me?  He points to his broken teeth
 
Me: I shake my head that it doesn't matter. Yes, you. Can I interview you?
 
Nameless Man:  What time is it? 

(Is he stalling?) 
Me: I don’t know? Hmmm…(I go to check my phone)
 
Nameless Man: (He tells me) It's about 1145a.  I need to meet someone at Starbucks.
 
Me: Oh.  Well I can walk with you.  (smile)
 
Nameless Man:  You want to interview me?!  I don’t want to give my name. 
 
Me: We can make one up! (I am excited to think that he may be open to this.)
 
Nameless Man:  I don’t want my picture taken.

Me: Oh, but it would be nice to have a picture of you! It is for my blog-site.  Do you know what a blog is? I like to write about people's stories. 
 
Nameless Man:  (He mumbles) Yes, I know what a blog is!
No pictures you can’t trust anyone!  The Government, the CIA, the FBI

Me: Ok no picture, (I reassure, oh dear, he might be delusional and I am upsetting him). I reach into my wallet compassionately pulling out dollar bills. No longer concerned with interviewing him, just helping him get some food.
 
Nameless Man:  He doesn't seem that interested in the the money as his eyes narrow.  “Who are you?” 
 
Me: (I answer simply) “I am Kris.”
 
Nameless Man:  “What do you do?”

Me: “I am a nurse.
 
Nameless Man: His eyes narrow even further, “Do you work with the mentally ill?”
 
Me:  “Yes.”  (I get excited once again.) “How did you know?”
 
Nameless Man:  (He stops walking and at this point seems purely exacerbated.)  “Well who else would stop and talk to the mentally ill??” 

 (I laugh loudly) He then mumbles.  Maybe you can meet my friend and talk to him.
 
Me: (he is trying to pawn me off on his unsuspecting friend!)  I chuckle thinking this as we approach the entrance to Starbucks. I start to go in planning on buying him coffee and breakfast.
 
Nameless Man:  (He eyes me again.) You’re going in for coffee?
 
Me: Yes
 
Nameless Man:  Well I will wait out here then.
 
Me: I walk in and after I do I look out and notice that he is gone.  And at this moment I think that maybe I am the crazy one as I stand there laughing at my own foolishness. 

Post Note:
​Last night when my son got home I told him about the interview (that wasn’t) with the older man on the street.
 
Liam:  Oh…(compassionately spoken and translated to that poor man)
Oh mom.  You aren’t a good interviewer.  You have to be subtle. 
 
Me:  I am not subtle.
 
Liam:  No.  You have to just get to know him slowly.  Like, “how are you?”  Not, "can I interview you."

Me:  Thanks, Liam 

10/19/16
I am not sure why I started these planned interviews for my blog site.  But do know why I picked  Kathryn to start.  Her vibrancy at the front desk of the yoga studio makes my class better and adds to my day.  She is perennially friendly, competent and helpful.  In life it seems that the people behind the scene often make the most difference but often get overlooked.  

The interview takes place on a sunny fall day at my home in Asheville with my Boston Terrier milling around curiously wondering what is going on this morning.
 
Questions:
 
Before the interview you had mentioned Tim and plans with him when we were trying to set a time up to meet. 
 Tim’s your boyfriend? What is he like?
Yes, I don’t know how to describe Tim.  You have met Tim, haven’t you?  He’s been to the studio before. He lives in Montana half the year and here the other half of the year.  He changes his appearance each time he comes back.  He might shave his head or have long hair and a straggly beard when he returns home.  He comes back to Asheville for the summer working as a raft guide and in the winter he’s in Montana working in a pizza place.
 
He shapeshifts? 
In appearance yes, but he is pretty consistent in his personality.
 
It sounds like he has a lot of energy!
Yes
 
Are you energetic?
No! My dimmer switch goes up and down all day. (laugh) (It changes) in terms of where I am in the day and my interactions.
 
Do you have kids?
No.  My friend once said that the world needs people who don’t have kids because they receive kids in a different and sweet adoring way.  She reassured me that it’s ok if you don’t have kids. Isn’t that a really beautiful thing to say?
 
I love that. 
And that is how I feel about your dog too. (I don’t have a dog either). (laugh)
 
Tell me a little about yourself?
That’s a hard question.  Just a little bit.  I don’t know. (Pause)
 
Who are you?
I guess everything I say is very telling on how I identify with my life and who I am.  (pause) A 35 year old yogi who has moved to Asheville which I refer to as Never Neverland.  To be near like minded people.  To heal and to feel safe. Um..yeah…yeah
 
How did you get into yoga?
The University of Florida offered free classes and I had a roommate who brought me to one.  I had a lot of back pain that was not quite diagnosed at the time and I think a doctor or maybe a massage therapist encouraged me to do yoga. I remember being in so much pain afterwards.  My legs hurt.  I was probably in tears that evening we had no idea what was going on with my spinal cord or the fact that I had a condition at all back then. 
 
Tell me about that?
So I have AVM in my spinal cord. Arteries and veins that are tangled up in little knots.  They are inside of it. Inside of the spinal cord. Inside of the dura.  It usually occurs in the brain but I have it in the spinal cord.  Making it challenging to remove, impossible really to take out.
 
When were you diagnosed (with AVM)?
Spring of 2006.  Ten years ago.  It ruptured after dinner one night.  I was having stroke like symptoms and couldn’t move my neck. I started vomiting. Went to the Emergency room.  (laughs) It wasn’t a subtle diagnosis.
 
How did life change on all domains from that point forward?
Big things happened. Procedures that I received took my chronic pain away that I was experiencing since I was 17.  I was finally able to feel free and move my body. Yeah, so. The quality of life improved dramatically.  I had validation for what I had been complaining about for all those years. I had answers.  Even my grandmother who is a nurse still says, I can’t believe that that was happening after all those years when you were complaining.  We thought you were just a fussy child. 
But that had started when I was 17 until I was 25.  I just didn’t feel heard.  The doctors didn’t take me seriously and it was kind of an indication that we are responsible for our health and for speaking up.
 
But you did?
Yeah, yeah I did. I think maybe I could have more? If I demanded going to a specialist. If I had demanded imaging or MRI or something. But at the same time I am happy that things unfolded the way they did.  
 
It is hard to demand these things when you are 17 or 23 or even 25 isn’t it?
Yes, I guess it is.  So that is how I got into yoga. Just trying. People said you should do yoga, you have sciatica. You should do this, you should do this.  I kept going to yoga class for a year or two.  Even though it was so painful. So the day of the hemorrhage. I was probably at a yoga class that morning.  
 
It must have been scary?
I was hospitalized and for two weeks was unaware of what was going on.  My parents flew in. My dad said it was the worst day of his life. I was out of it. I had tubes in me and on pain meds. It wasn’t until I got home that I started freaking out.  Where as the rest of the family, my boyfriend it was a sigh of relief thank God she is home.  Those two weeks were hell for them but I was on a dilaudid drip so (I) was like 'Oh, I don’t care.'  So that was challenging (when I got home) waking up in the fog like holy shit what just happened!?  But my friends were saying, ‘Oh but you should be so grateful.  You were so lucky.’  That being the story like a year or longer after.  I was pretty depressed and shaken.  I was in therapy trying to figure it out.  I was too much in my head about it.  Like not being stuck and so heavy after would have been better (for me).
 
When did you come to Asheville? 
Six years ago. 
 
A year after I came here?
Yeah. 

Didn’t you car get broken into at that time? 
Yes. My friend’s car. My purse was stolen  
 
I remember that. Weren’t you on the parkway? 
Yes, Bent Creek.
 
I was at the studio that night and was so impressed that you were upbeat and in a good mood the day your car was broken into. You were talking about how someone broke into your car (your friend’s car) and had stolen your purse. 
Yes, my keys were in the car.  It was a snowy night and the landlords weren’t answering the phone. I came to yoga and I had my phone next to my mat because I had nowhere else to go. Yeah maybe that was the night I met you or the next day? 
 
I don’t know if that was the day I met you but it was the day I remember meeting you.  I was so impressed by your attitude. 
Translating to what goes on in my body especially after the last couple of years.  Everything is so relative in terms of what is important and what is so scary. I was like oh well I need to change my bank account and get a spare keys. 


That is what I remember, you were so upbeat and “oh well”. 
Yeah, and a few weeks later that is when the identity theft started happening from that situation.
 
You had identity theft? 
Yeah, the woman had stolen my ID, which is what they were really after.  They knew I banked at Bank of America and even though I had gotten all new account numbers and cards they apparently had this thorough scheme of wigs and hats and would go to the furthest drive-through outside at the bank and pretend to be whosever ID that they had and cash bad checks against their accounts.  And so, yeah, I did get pretty pissed about that. BOA froze my account for a couple weeks I had no access to any of my funds. She would dress up like me and write bad checks.  That is when I started to get pissed.
 
Is she in jail?
I think so.  I didn’t keep up with what happened but since it was my girlfriend’s car and it was in her name she was contacted with all the updates when they finally caught them a couple of months later.
 
What is your most memorable moment in yoga? 
Hmmm There is so many…pause. I think when I started really taking savasana as a pose and really started to pay attention to what words that teachers would use during savasana or to get you into it.  And um…and really practicing dying.  Shala (a yoga teacher at AYC) once said, “What else can you release right now.” When I am in savasana I often hear that in my head.
 
What do you do? What is your job?
Technically I am a receptionist.  I often equate AYC as an airport (laughs).  Guiding the masses.  Yeah, I check people into class and figure out what packages and memberships would be best for them.  I make sure that the teachers are ok and have everything that they need. I like to think that I am responsible for the energy in the studio and in the lobby.
 
What do you like best about your job? 
The people!  The students that I get to see everyday.  I feel super fortunate after having three surgeries in two years. Being able to come back to work and actually feel like my job was helping me get better and heal because of the faces I get to see everyday. 
 
Tell me about the person at the studio, doesn’t have to be a teacher but can be, that you admire most?  What qualities or characteristics do you admire? 
I would say it is probably Sierra (yoga teacher).  Her dedication to her practice, to service.  To serving other people.  Her students. To always re-orienting everything to positivity and light while being direct and an activist.  She does her practice without even questioning the option of practicing that day.  An example, during a five day training she had an optional sadhana for her students at 430a.  She woke up at 230a to drive into Asheville, to lead this optional sit.  Taught all day, then stayed to teach her 7pm class and I said, “Now you get to go to bed? And she said, no I have to do my practice because I didn’t get to do it this morning.  I said (to her) can’t you take a day off.  Oh but I am doing a 90 day thing (and part of it is a daily practice).  The way she said it didn’t make it seem like an unhealthy relationship with her practice.  No it is just one day out of my life that I have to do this insane day.  But to me it showed how dedicated she is to her students.  She didn’t have to teach a 7pm class she could have gotten a sub for class, she didn’t have to offer a 430a optional sadhana.  She could have stayed at my house.  I told her (stay with me).  But she said if I stayed over and wasn’t able to sleep…Yeah. I get that, I get that.
 
If you were going to right now today or in the last couple of weeks pick an archetype what would it be? 
Sometimes I think I am just a messenger.
 
(Oscar my dog comes over and sits next to Kathryn)  
Hello lovely!  Did you have a nice nap?
 
So tell me about messenger?  What does that mean?
I don’t feel like I am a nomad but just like I am passing on information that I have received or I have learned. 
 
Lessons you have learned.  Like lessons that you have learned during this lifetime or that you have come into the world with. 
I suppose both.

So with every archetype there is a shadow?  For you what is it?
I suppose it is the waiting…for when I am called to be useful
 
Give me an example of how you are useful?
I have friends who are trained therapists and they come to me when they are having a hard time processing.  I feel so honored. 
 
Yes, I can see this and you can make your point with just a few words.
 
What were you like as a little kid? 
Outgoing, articulate.  My mom says that I was talking when I was one. Sharp, always scored high on tests but could never sit down long enough to do homework.  (laughs) They had to put me in a different pre-school because I wouldn’t nap.
 
So tell me more about Tim your boyfriend.
Well I met him at a friends wedding.  He was officiating. 
 
So he’s verbal?
No (laughs).  He was a practicing attorney in the state that they lived in.
 
What do you like most about Tim?
He’s been my best teacher.  I have had to be super clear with what I want with him. Which hasn’t always been easy (for me).  He told me that he doesn’t easily read emotions ‘so if you need me to know something you have to tell me.’
 
Don’t you think those words are portable to all relationships?
I suppose so (laughs)
 
Who annoys you most?
Ghosts from my past.  People who remind me of my hometown and act entitled.  Not grateful. Cannot recognize what they have.  Or the pseudo spiritual people.  Where arrogance meets spirituality.  Isn’t yoga all good yoga?” “We have to start somewhere.”
 
Yes
 
Are you a yoga teacher?
I started teaching before I trained.  I worked for a non profit in Florida (through the University) and taught yoga there until they lost funding. Then I came to AVL and went through teacher training at AYC.  I didn’t need to teach though, there are so many great teachers here.
 
AYC is a very successful studio.  What do you credit its success to?
​Super organic growth. Never had a plan for it.  Teachers just showing up and people showing up and then demanding teacher training.
 
What advice would you give someone trying to break into the business or open a studio? 
Don’t quit your day job. (laughs) A local teacher once said that he enjoys teaching so much because he doesn’t rely on it financially.
 
Tell me about your spiritual belief system?  
Well I was raised as a Christian and then was agnostic but now I believe in something like Carl Sagan. A force or energy.  Something that we don't have an instrument to measure.  A Force or Energy that is God.


What words do you want to close with?
“Don’t give up on the journey.”
 
http://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/spinal-arteriovenous-malformations/basics/definition/con-20036382