A little client of mine came in with a pout on her face that she wasn’t going to go to camp this summer. She was digging in her heels and according to her mom this was something she did often when confronted with change. Change isn’t easy for any of us and for a few it is especially hard. We develop these rote ways of doing things and then patterns set in and we get comfortable. It isn’t easy to challenge the known, but when we do enter into new ways of living we can start to open up our eyes to how life can be fresh. We live through our mind. So in order to change the mind we need to change the way we live.
I sometimes share stories with my clients to help them see another way, as this is how I’ve learned. Through stories. Here’s an unabridged version of the story I shared with her:
When I was 16 I was riding my bike through my hometown. Weaving between stopped traffic at a red light not realizing that the right lane was still moving. I weave in front of a moving car and was hit by it. It was a sturdy black car driven by a nervous man, made more nervous by my bike flying in front of his car. He was at a loss to stop. I wasn’t injured; just the frame of my bike was bent.
I was embarrassed and the driver horrified. He stopped and insisted that we call an ambulance. Mr. Gray had children around my age and his son Peter was in my class. As if this wasn’t awkward enough, Mr. Gray ended up being my math teacher at St. John Fisher College, the summer of my freshman year.
After the bike incident in which I had another run in with cars, I basically stopped riding my bike. I think the feeling of embarrassment was greater than any injury incurred or any sustaining trauma. Walking or running seemed an easier way to avoid future collusions.
But for whatever reason, lately I have decided to try ‘something new’ and have wanted to explore bike riding. I am surrounded by cyclists in Asheville; an outdoor mecca for mountain bikers. So with my new beach bike that I won at an auction that was supposed to have three speeds but only one is working (a missing part to blame) I have ventured out again on a bike after 30 years. I try to choose a time of day when not many cars are on the road. I am going to ease into this. Not only for my benefit but also for the benefit of those on the road. When the sun is up but all is quiet you might find me forming new treads and a new way of being so that I can start to look at life through fresh eyes and let go of some of the past spokes of behavior that weren’t working so well for me in the past.
I sometimes share stories with my clients to help them see another way, as this is how I’ve learned. Through stories. Here’s an unabridged version of the story I shared with her:
When I was 16 I was riding my bike through my hometown. Weaving between stopped traffic at a red light not realizing that the right lane was still moving. I weave in front of a moving car and was hit by it. It was a sturdy black car driven by a nervous man, made more nervous by my bike flying in front of his car. He was at a loss to stop. I wasn’t injured; just the frame of my bike was bent.
I was embarrassed and the driver horrified. He stopped and insisted that we call an ambulance. Mr. Gray had children around my age and his son Peter was in my class. As if this wasn’t awkward enough, Mr. Gray ended up being my math teacher at St. John Fisher College, the summer of my freshman year.
After the bike incident in which I had another run in with cars, I basically stopped riding my bike. I think the feeling of embarrassment was greater than any injury incurred or any sustaining trauma. Walking or running seemed an easier way to avoid future collusions.
But for whatever reason, lately I have decided to try ‘something new’ and have wanted to explore bike riding. I am surrounded by cyclists in Asheville; an outdoor mecca for mountain bikers. So with my new beach bike that I won at an auction that was supposed to have three speeds but only one is working (a missing part to blame) I have ventured out again on a bike after 30 years. I try to choose a time of day when not many cars are on the road. I am going to ease into this. Not only for my benefit but also for the benefit of those on the road. When the sun is up but all is quiet you might find me forming new treads and a new way of being so that I can start to look at life through fresh eyes and let go of some of the past spokes of behavior that weren’t working so well for me in the past.
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